Remember when Bronson Arroyo was a thing? Here's some spots he did for a Cincinnati meat company that include him singing like some rock star, and one of their TV guys drooling over pre-packaged food.
I don't know what's better: having to dramatically sing "BEEF HOO-OOOH GEEE", or just having to give the camera that silly look at the end.
They can't screw it up this time, right?
I got into a discussion with a friend of mine over this trailer, and what it means in comparison to the 1998 movie (you know, with Matthew Broderick, Godzilla's Derp Jaw, and Puff Daddy absolutely violating a classic Led Zepplin song?). He didn't know why this was considered some cinematic sacred cow, considering the awfulness of the earlier films. "They're meant to be bad, right?"
Well, sorta. They looked cheap, sure, and it was even worse watching the awful dubbing. But they were still at least fun. You got to watch a dude in a rubber suit beat up another dude in a rubber suit, while destroying a fake Tokyo. There's worse ways to burn an hour and a half as a kid. Toho Studios have released a total of 28 of these movies now, while the United States only has two: the original movie with Raymond Burr jammed in, and the 1998 debacle.
This? This looks good. Big monster. City on fire. They'll fire a bunch of missles at it and it'll run away, only to do it again in 3 years. Perfect. Don't screw it up.
No, Texas forcing Mack Brown isn't pissing me off right now. While it's a chump move, that's the Longhorns own little world of drama. Texas Forever, Riggins.
No, instead my eyes fall upon lowly Arkansas State. The Red Wolves are playing in the GoDaddy.com Bowl against Ball State, but they'll be doing it without a head coach, as Bryan Harsin is taking the job at Boise State. No surprise: Harsin was an assistant with the Broncos for 8 years, between 2002 and 2010. What is a bit of a surprise is that Harsin is leaving Arkansas State after only a year on the job.
Here's the real kicker: this is the 3rd coach in a row to leave the Red Wolves after one season. Hugh Freeze left after 2011 to go to Ole Miss, and Gus Malzahn coached 2012 before going to Auburn.
I know I complained about something similar when I penned my bit about Dave Clawson leaving BG for Wake Forest. But this is something else. It's not like the Wolves are an Eastern Michigan team, doomed to mediocrity. They won the Sun Belt 3 years in a row! And each time the team was rewarded with a coaching search.
Why would any player commit to Arkansas State right now? Harsin had a 5 year deal with Arkansas State, but only needed to clear $1;75 million to get out of that. I'm sure Boise will write that check without issue.
I don't know how to fix it, either. Considering the Wolves play on the same level as the Broncos, and the Longhornes, and everything else, there's just no way for them to keep anybody remotely successful past a couple of seasons.
Remember when Gary Pinkel was asked about the Washington job, and he just simply saidhe's not interested? Jumping schools isn't his game. He may be the last of the good guys left.
Now two days removed from my love letter to college football, and I'm really starting to regret what I wrote.
News broke last night that Dave Clawson, head coach at Bowling Green, has taken the job at Wake Forest. The Orange and Brown gets immediately cast aside for the, what, black and gold? And a wheelbarrow full of cash. The kids that got him there? The kids who led a surprising upset of the 14th ranked Northern Illinois Huskies? Left in the dust. "Have fun at the Pizza Bowl! I'm off to North Carolina!"
Can someone tell me if the hardware shop is even finished printing "Bowling Green Falcons" on the MAC Trophy yet?
Texting a friend of mine who's in the sports management business, he says "When a school calls, they want you immediately. Particularly for recruiting."
I don't buy that for a second. There is no bit of recruiting that can be done between December 9th and December 26th that's going to make a lick of difference. If a school can't wait for you to honor your committment to your current team, then perhaps they're not a school you want to coach for. If they don't care about your loyalty for your kids, then how can you expect them to be loyal to you?
Or maybe Coach Clawson isn't loyal. Maybe he's like so many others who pass through the MAC. Like the city councilman who wants to be mayor, it's just a stepping stone. Willing to toss people aside at a moment's notice for a shot at more.
I don't blame these guys for taking bigger jobs. I honestly don't. But at least do your kids the service of leading them into their bowl. There are plenty of other teams that didn't get that luxury.
Just a day after I penned my love letter to college football, it spit in my face and kicked my dog. Metaphorically, of course.
The bowl committees of the world turned their back on the Toledo Rockets, who will be sitting at home this postseason. A 7-5 record made them eligible, but despite wins over eventual champion Bowling Green and Tough-as-nails Buffalo, losses to Northern Illinois, Ball State, and Akron was enough to sink 'em.
The rumor mill was that they'd be going to the Beef O' Brady's Bowl, but a last-second push by Ohio got them the trip over Toledo.
How surprising was the news? They were so sure they'd play in the postseason, that they hadn't stopped practicing. They got the news after practice on Sunday.
I guess I shouldn't be surprised: it's never about what you did at the start of the year, but rather what you did at the end. And a loss to Akron burns. It doesn't matter that the pieces that helped Toledo beat Bowling Green and Buffalo were out with injury, the fact that you couldn't win without them is damning enough. Can't really argue with that.
Coach Campbell made no excuses, saying that you can't put your fate in other people's hands; you have to go out and get it. And, in the silly bowl system that college football exists in, merit isn't the only thing that matters in bowls. Television draw, travelling crowds, etc. etc. etc. can push one team out and another in.
But let's look forward: The men's basketball team is a perfect 8-0. They even got a vote in the AP poll this week. And if I know Coach Campbell, he'll have this team reloaded and ready to go in 2014.